By Matthew B. Zeidman
NEW YORK (RushPRnews/Hollywood Today) 12/3/08 â€“ MTVâ€™s new documentary, â€œBritney: For the Record,â€ delivered what it promised Sunday, bringing viewers into the world of â€œWomanizerâ€ singer Britney Spears and portraying the pop icon as both winsome and tragic.
â€œItâ€™s all Iâ€™ve ever known. I donâ€™t see it as weird,â€ Spears told MTV of her life in the spotlight, which included a constant barrage of aggressive paparazzi vying for candid photos of the 26-year-old starlet.
The networkâ€™s cameras followed Spears for several weeks around Los Angeles and New York and painted a picture of a passionate performer trapped by her own fame.
Though she lamented the freedom to step out in public that even A-lister Jessica Alba and her own sister enjoy, she firmly dismissed the idea that she was a victim or her own success.
â€œYou see, I donâ€™t like thatâ€”a â€˜victimâ€™ of that success. Iâ€™ve been placed in that category for some reason, and I hate that, because I love to see people making the most of their situations and being positive, and Iâ€™m a true believer in that,â€ Spears said. â€œMe sitting here complaining and stuff like that, I hate that. I hate when people do that.â€
Spears also revealed her infamous head-shaving incident was her way of rebelling or â€œsheddingâ€ painful moments in her life and admitted she felt â€œtoo in controlâ€ and without passion.
â€œItâ€™s better just not to feel anything at all and have hope than to feel the other way,â€ Spears said, shortly before breaking into tears and declaring, â€œIâ€™m sad.â€ She told MTV she felt the handlers, doctors and other people in her life would only listen to her feelings selectively and interpret them through their own lens.
â€œIâ€™m not gonna sugarcoat it and say that I was OK,â€ Spears said of her turbulent moments in 2007 and early 2008. She admitted she let â€œbad peopleâ€ into her life because of intense loneliness and that she â€œreally paid the consequences for thatâ€¦big time.â€
â€œIâ€™m definitely angry with myself for letting people take advantage of me,â€ Spears revealed. â€œIâ€™m [also] angry with people for taking advantage of me and for letting me go on for so long, but I have to go on with it.â€
The one-hour, 10-minute program also included the entertainerâ€™s performance at a Los Angeles Madonna concert, where the â€œMaterial Girlâ€ herself took the time to speak to the camera and commend Spears for her ability to look back and analyze what went wrong in her life and take control of her future.
â€œThereâ€™s a certain fragility about her and vulnerability about her that makes me feel maternal towards her, and there are aspects about her that I recognize in myself when I first started out in my career,â€ Madonna said of the woman who has often cited her as an inspiration. â€œI also admire her talent as an artist.
â€œI was very privileged in my own life to go to New York, make mistakes and have scary situations, make wrong decisions, choose wrong people to do things withâ€¦without the whole world putting a magnifying glass on you, and sheâ€™s never had that opportunity.â€
Lest the media categorize Spears as awash in sorrow and self-pity, the Louisiana native made it clear she sees the glass as half full.
â€œI choose to be a happy person,â€ said Spears. â€œI choose not to be a bitter person. If I have a bad day, I get really angry with myself and I flip it and I tell myself Iâ€™m gonna have a good day. Iâ€™m gonna be strong. I will be strong, and thatâ€™s what I choose to do.â€
Spears kicked off the release of her latest album, â€œCircus,â€ as well as her 27th birthday on Tuesdayâ€™s episode of ABC talk show â€œGood Morning America.â€